what i think when i think about myself

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the unembellished glass on my window
is not of a reflecting kind, it changes color
with the sun’s brow, disguised by its own
retention of what hitherto it did beget –

when i think about selves, i mirror
the glass of my window, and pluck apples
from my eyes to taste the sense of sight,
and single out every experience in its own light,

when i think about lives, i snigger
like the loony bark of the mutt outside, and push
into the so-called oblivion, a thought to right
the wrongs of being one of a kind, of this plight,

when i think about you, i am triggered
by your mirror of my own life, and try to pick
from your eyes, any sign of a comic relief, to indict
myself for subsumption of an egotistic delight,

when i think about myself, i quiver
like the potent wine of the sky outside, and pull
out from my own self, a torn thought to site
every memory, to extinguish into the night.

.

For Poets United Midweek Motif

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And that is when I get hurt…

I ask myself not to expect

anything from anyone

you are all alone

and that is the sole truth

but I expect

and that is when I get hurt.

~

I ask myself not to speak

anything to anyone

don’t open your heart

for people will judge you

but I speak

and that is when I get hurt.

~

I ask myself not to dream

anything, not a single thing

don’t fantasize what

you can never have

but I dream

and that is when I get hurt.

~

I expect. I speak. I dream.

And I get hurt.

Look me in the eyes

Look me in the eyes

these eyes tell my story

look beyond those tears

look beyond that renitence

that appears in my eyes

Look and tell me

what you see in them

tell me what you perceive

tell me my own story

story I don’t know myself

for I can’t look

in my own eyes.

May be the future isn’t so bright for me…

May be the future isn’t so bright for me

May be I won’t always be free

But at least I won’t be as trapped as I am now

I know no one, not even I myself can make such a vow

But I got to have some faith in something

May be my decision won’t solve everything

But I got to believe, I got to have some hope

I need to stay clinging to some rope

May be the future isn’t so bright for me

But I can hope it is a far better tree

than the one upon which I sit today

Maybe I will find the lighting ray

One which will make it all fine for me

Even if I won’t always be free.