a dark communion

fall_down_by_jungshan

the crow perched on the black railing,
our dark eyes confronted each other
for a moment,

he thought it to be inconsequential,
looked hither-thither and flew away
in a gust of air, that hung before me,
leaving a trance-like image,
right before my difficult breath,

if i were him, i would have done away
with it, but his nonchalance
only made me wary
of my own condition,

i am burning without fever,
i am shivering without cold,

the food has lost its flavor,
water, its pungent taste,
to drench the morsels of belief,

what if

this was it, this is it,
this would be all —

this unremarkable grey sky
reduced to my grey vision,
my pudgy, little fingers
no longer capable,

every thought bursting in its own smoke –
left-over chunks of an explosion –

this wrecked structure, this unused
view —

would i be afloat
when i fall?

~

© Anmol Arora 2018

For Midweek Motif at PU
Image source

***

I have been working on a new Insta handle for over a month now, for literary and creative posts: @anmol.ha.
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24 thoughts on “a dark communion

  1. Susan says:

    What we don’t know, but ask again and again (whenever someone extraordinary–like a crow–looks at us without care). LOVE the McClain song. Turn it into a blues, and the thing is uplifting–go figure. Thanks for this amazing poem.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pat: willow88switches says:

    extremely angst filled, yet with a delicate touch of the insouciance and indifference that comes from always being on that razor thin edge … of being caught, between “here and there” – the counterpane pointed dance of hope and absolute despair; and it stains and taints and one longs and wishes for wings … but yet, is there relief to be found?

    you’ve so well captured the whole totality of what it means to be so enmeshed and wrapped up in these feelings –

    and the music is just wonderful, but then, I’m partial to the blues 😔

    and I have to say, I really loved the second stanza, the words and tone are just perfect …

    he thought it to be inconsequential, …. leaving a trance-like image,
    right before my difficult breath,

    that is so powerfully evocative ….

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Pat. It was written in the haze of a smoke-addled mind — it leaves that kind of a trace in words thus penned.
      Blues set the mood for the unraveling of thoughts — I prefer ghazals when I want to lose myself in them. Ha! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  3. sanaarizvi says:

    It is said that when we encounter a black crow, just tune into its behavior and it will give us a clue on how to use the wisdom it carries. Life is unpredictable and often lures us into desolation and despair … the “what ifs” posed in this poem are heart-wrenchingly powerful and makes me contemplate and question the purpose of life all over again ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  4. There is not an answer to every situation. Bold action may suffice, bluff is a possibility, diplomacy might help but in the end the only two real options are retreat or face the consequences…but decide quickly or the decision will be taken out of your hands.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. The idea of reaching a point when change or growth or better is not possible… is a terrifying one. What would one live for if live offers nothing new and the old seems so bleak? I, too, wonder if there would even be something I would want to float on.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. hypercryptical says:

    A dark write Anmol, thick with the greyness you describe so well, wrought from the anguish of a despairing soul.
    I’m not quite sure whether you are alluding to bridge-jumping, but if so, the finality of this act always concerned me, when it was spoken to me by folk who were considering doing it, and I would speak to them of this finality, the inability to change ones mind upon the leap to the fall.
    During my work life, I’ve bandaged many a cut wrist before sending off to hospital or urged others to attend same after overdosing, for in these desperate acts, the finality wasn’t written in stone and the ability to change ones mind was there.
    But although I’ve walked in the shadow of these beautiful people, I have never walked in their shoes, so have never judged others from my comfortable place.
    I do so hope your words are of past memories and feelings and are not of now.
    The kindest of regards.
    Anna :o]

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