conversation at the end of a time loop

Time Loop Painting by amber shack

the coffee-stain looks devilish in its laughter,
while the muslin tablecloth tumbles over itself
in the roaring delight of an invisible audience.

i am embroidered in red and deep cerulean,
looking at the passage of time through a key-
-hole, which is jammed with promises never
made. i know that my nerves pale and dilute
in comparison to your word-while capillaries
that shout & shout against my walled silences.

“it isn’t really that hard to hide,” you say briefly,
you smirk to the quivering of my voice,
(the throat-bell still ringing in the wind).

i will pick up the plotholes and yield to your words,
if you would only promise that this was never
a dream or a pigeon’s hope, cut by the Chinese string
of a wayward kite.

i am a diffused lamp-light, figuring & disfiguring
every stitch and flip like an old game of playing cards,
that i still cannot begin to envisage or win.

i still grin like the Joker to your objection.
i can still bury my head to hide my sins,
all that i’ve got to lose when it is dark.

.
© Anmol Arora

Day 5
(Inter)National Poetry Month

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Our True Selves + Story of the Swamp Deer and Us

A different way of seeing yourself… Seeing yourself in a different light- it would definitely show you the inner-most feelings that you’re trying to hide even from yourself. You may not even identify the person you really are. And that is the path where we all fail in loving ourselves- the true ourselves.

I had heard a long time back,

In the days of childhood,

The story of a swamp deer,

Who adored his lovely antlers,

Sitting atop his head.

This was the personality of his,

He really really adored,

But couldn’t see his flexible legs,

Because they were ugly.

He had a false perception of himself,

Which just covered his beauty,

He could no more see his real power,

The power that his legs beheld.

Once going through the forest by the lake,

Admiring the shadow of his lovely antlers,

The swamp deer heard the loud call,

Of the vicious predator wolves.

The voice came from nearby,

And the deer knew this time is so wry,

He started to run away from the voice,

But till then the wolves had got his trail,

And now were now behind their prey.

The swamp deer started running away,

And soon it seemed he had lost the wolves,

All thanks to his long flexible legs,

That gave him the power of running so well.

The swamp deer took a deep breath of relief,

But still in order to save himself,

Made an incentive to hide in the long bushes.

As he entered the bushes, everything went loose,

For his beautiful antlers got stuck in the bushes.

He tried, struggled to get them free,

But there was nothing he could do.

All his struggles were in vain,

And all of a sudden again came the howl.

It seemed as if the prey has been found again,

The swamp deer tried to get himself free,

He struggled even more and more,

And now even cursed God for his beautiful antlers.

The rest of the story goes like as what you can imagine,

The legs at first saved the swamp deer,

But his beautiful antlers brought him death,

For he could not accept himself fully,

He couldn’t know his real power,

That resided in his legs.

Similar is the case of us all,

We get a perception, we love ourselves,

For the image we have of us in our minds,

But the powerful truth resides in our feelings,

Within us, hence, it is time for us to embrace “us”.