who can verify the cost/revenue of this departure
from personhood?
i can see the light waves on the spectrum
of my performance — my silhouette & skin
are linked with an intransigent belief that
i am not alright or enough to be seen/heard.
the pain of birth leaves marks on my face,
small and insignificant, and still relevant
to my image seen in the deep recesses of
your unwavering eyes. i see how you see me —
an anomaly, an unnatural product of
your imagination,
an offensive form, a mouth drawn by
your discomfort.
i am paying my debt to this earth and its sentient
beings, by giving myself up and away, little by
little, piece by piece,
letting go of my (un)acknowledged/embellished/performed
body before it becomes dust & rain and fear & shame.
.
© Anmol Arora
Also read on self-sabotaging, on panic, and on loneliness
Linking it up with The Tuesday Platform at With Real Toads, where Sanaa is hosting this week with an introduction to the poetics of Marilyn Hacker
HA's Place 