the pleasure of selfhood

raju2
it is falling like a sun-pigment, down
with three-eyed cues to evoke sentiments,
bringing the yellow with orange with brown,
and the toil of ball-clay-modeled laments.
it drinks the warmth and bathes in lasting sin-
full holds of my fine-textured, genteel hands.
it is the hue that pigments my blotched skin,
and reminds me of the last rain’s soaked sand.

it is the sheath to my patterned truths — pain
that rests and rumbles in wakeful sleeping.
it is the ferrous wonder of force — gained
with a compliant resolve for melding
hopes and despairs with an equal measure,
and dreaming of an eve’s ochrous pleasure.

.

© Anmol Arora 2018

A sonnet (Shakespearean rhymes, sans iambs) for With Real Toads’ Weekend Mini Challenge
Image source (Subtle Ochre by Raju Durshettiwar)

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I have been working on a new Insta handle for over a month now, for literary and creative posts: @anmol.ha.
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39 thoughts on “the pleasure of selfhood”

  2. sanaarizvi says:

    Now that is exquisite! ❤ I can feel the heat of sun so clearly in your sonnet – the words offer both piercing ache and palpable hope a perfect blend of pysche and emotion that each of us own. Especially like “it drinks the warmth and bathes in lasting sin-full holds of my fine-textured, genteel hands.” ☺

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  3. Who does these painting from which you write? This one is mos def ocher and the poem is as well. Well done with this color which you carried through the entire poem. I like “it is the sheath to my patterned truths” because I love swords and this puts me in mind of mine. Brilliant us of color to describe the dry season. Just brilliant.

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    • Thanks for the kind words, Toni. I had incidentally been thinking of the color through the day — contrary to the dryness of the verse, it rained here all day long and yet the color stayed. So, the challenge suited me pretty well. Ha!

      I write first and then look for the art accompaniment unless I am doing an Ekphrastic verse (which I do once in a blue moon). It is as a much a part of my creative process as anything else, sometimes taking half a day to prepare the post after spending the first half writing, reading and editing. I mostly use Google Images and my Tumblr feed (I follow all the art page suggestions) for my search, through different keywords. As you can see, this one is by Raju Durshettiwar. Since this is a not-for-profit use, I include the work and give the credits due to the artist by linking back to its original source. 🙂

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  4. Pat: willow88switches says:

    Ochre is such a weird colour – as if its undetermined which way to be – yellowish or brown – so it speaks of both, with a voice both enlivened and deadening – falling into decay. And in some ways, this sonnet speaks of this – this cusp of – of breath held, and the waiting of the long exhale – of how like sand, which can be rock hard, like concrete and yet, completely yielding, and all swallowing. And when I read this poem, I hold a sense of listlessness – of not quite knowing – and when I listen to the music, it is both lovely and sad – melancholic. And the painting, is most beautiful – as light as air and yet strangely grounded; so in some ways, this speaks of both earth and air – and fire – for the heat that transforms – either destroys or emboldens.

    (I have no idea if I’ve interpreted this at all, as intended, but these are my overall impressions. All I can offer is this, in the moment.)

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    • I love your interpretation through these elements and how they correspond with the cognitive processes — listlessness is something that occupies space both in its presence and absence.
      Indeed. These elements are malleable, in how they can both be harsh and yielding, encapsulating the form and nature of all living beings.

      Thank you for your thoughtful comment. 🙂

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    • I like how you find that distinction between the two — dull ache and seductive pleasure form the basis of existence at times.
      I too loved the piano instrumental; came across the musician by chance; glad to have incorporated his art in this post.
      Thank you for your kind words. ❤

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  12. I got much ochrous pleasure from your sonnet, Anmol, which to me is the colour of India, ‘falling like a sun-pigment’ and
    ‘bringing the yellow with orange with brown,
    and the toil of ball-clay-modeled laments’.
    I especially love the lines:
    ‘it is the hue that pigments my blotched skin,
    and reminds me of the last rain’s soaked sand’
    and
    ‘it is the ferrous wonder of force — gained
    with a compliant resolve for melding
    hopes and despairs with an equal measure’.

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  17. ‘it is the sheath to my patterned truths — pain
    that rests and rumbles in wakeful sleeping.”

    interesting juxtaposition of peace and disturbance

    Happy you dropped by my sumi-e Sunday today

    Much🎶💛🎶

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  20. Jim says:

    A nice walk through, HA. Starting with the “with three-eyed cues”(I loved that, wonderful in setting the scene) and ending with “an eve’s ochrous pleasure.”
    p.s. I read this last night on the bed and thought I had left a comment. Sorry, but I must not have. Sudden sleepy time I guess.
    ..

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  23. “it drinks the warmth and bathes in lasting sin-
    full holds of my fine-textured, genteel hands.” And all the other “pleasures of selfhood” as reflected in yellows. intriguing images. This is my favorite. And I love the music.

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