This Hunt

nearing night, a shadow falls
into the uncomplicated arms of
twilight, the sun still sets,

there is a dark smile of an angel
that descends into a flood
submerging all the air, into
emotions.

you extinguish the flame, by
a flick of your wrist, I sit
in the womb of a couch,
feeling for a tentative touch
to relinquish all desire.

a breath transcends when you
look at me like a fierce lion,
waiting for the right second to
pounce, and smear your paws
with my blood, and into the moon
eclipsed by a shadow of this hunt.

A shadow of transfixed and
curved delight.

.

At With Real Toads, Grace introduces us to the verse of the Mexican poet, David Huerta. Inspired from his writing and using one of his lines(translated by Mark Schafer), I wrote a few words. This is at best a first draft.
Linking it up with Poetry Pantry at PU as well.

Art by Karen F. Rose

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24 thoughts on “This Hunt

  1. I cannot understand ..perhaps it’s just me that you would say at best this a first draft?! All of it particularly that first stanza, I found enticing to read. Don’t put your work down Anmol, for I see this as beauty.

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  2. You truly and eloquently found your own way into that “shadow of transfixed / and
    curved delight.” The first two stanzas are my faves–such a wonderful evocation of mood.

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  3. Dark smile of the angel, I like the menace of the hunt ~ The shadow in the ending gave this a twist in character ~ I admire your interpretation very much ~

    Thanks for participating HA and wishing you happy weekend ~

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  4. This is a very sensual sort of hunt! With many reversals on expectation that are quite clever–the arms of twilight is a beautiful line, and so many that follow–thanks HA. k.

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  5. nice contrast between the desire and danger…
    this other seems all powerful…to douse the light with a flick of the wrist
    and then the last couple lines bring out the pleasure of such a hunt as well…

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  6. Kerry O'Connor says:

    This is great poetry. The scene unfolds at just the right pace. I thought the second last stanza was particularly remarkable and the conclusion is perfect.

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  7. I agree both with the comments above and the writer’s need to “tweak” ones work into perfection. I tend to do this all the time. Woe betide those who have a second visit and find the poem changed!

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  8. Quite the moment of clear desire within this, and excellent use of the line from the “Fruit” poem. It is neat to see the differences between two responses in a single poem.

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  9. You really nailed here the mood and the focus Huerta seems to project in his love poems, of love as a desperation of the senses which it is futile to control and alarming but necessary to absorb, interpret, become. I love especially the lion look, and the dark angel that descends ‘into a flood.’

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  10. The mystery and delight mixing here with magic suppressed passion….what will happen next – between shadows and twilight…. I appreciate the composition of poem~ penned masterfully!

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