Confusion

The curtains aren’t put aside today. I don’t want light to intervene while I am cursing myself, while I am pitying myself. Again I am realizing that I want to be depressed. And what if I am not depressed at all, what if it is all just a ploy against me inflicted by me. That thought, indeed, makes me feel stressed and then anxious and finally confused.

I want me to think but I am somehow restraining myself from thinking. I am either imagining silly stuff or just brooding over the moment.

It isn’t a very depressing situation for me, but I want to believe otherwise. That is very confusing, I know.

I am not feeling anything- but still I am feeling a little confused. That is very confusing- I am confused, confusion… confusion… confusion… damn!

There are so many things occurring at once, I am trying to write out what is happening to me right now, my head has started to ache all of a sudden right now, I am feeling all the more confused right now.

C

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F

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ABOUT WHAT?

I don’t know-

I am just-

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D